Voting? That's so Twentieth Century

As I write this, the United States is preparing for the next MOST IMPORTANT ELECTION IN HISTORY. This time, it's bigger and more importanter than that last one with what's-his-name... You know who I'm talking about. A week from today, the country will vote, and the stakes are high. If the Republicans remain in control of Congress, we will likely continue to spiral down into violence, environmental devastation and economic hardship. However, if compassionate, intelligent folks can "get out the vote" and put the Democrats in power... They'll probably thank them for the access to all those bribes and then proceed to do their part to bring human civilization to its ugly and brutal conclusion.

A common misconception about Karl Marx is that he hated capitalism and thought communism was the be all and end all to human society. The ratio of people who talk about Marx as if they've read him to those who have actually read him still stands at about 20 to 1. Marx praised capitalism as a necessary step forward in humanity's social progress. Who can seriously argue that capitalism is worse than pure iron fist despotism or feudalism? Marx was simply pointing out the inherent flaws and encouraging us to learn from our mistakes and evolve. Nowadays, he's just conservative talk radio's favorite effigy (excluding Bill Clinton, of course) when they're in the mood for burning something.

I didn't really set out to talk about Karl Marx, here. Bear with me. Here in Pennsylvania, we have a Senator named Rick Santorum. Rick Santorum is a crazy person. Aside from being the worst kind of religious nut (the kind in government), he is also a ranking republican senator and thus wields considerable influence. How could the democrats possibly take down a powerful member of the establishment like Rick Santorum?

There is only one feature a candidate can use to overcome such odds. Intelligent, progressive ideas? Nope. A critical approach to American government and society? Get serious. Good looks and a winning smile? Getting warmer.

Name Recognition.

Rick Santorum's opponent is a man named Bob Casey (Jr). Fellow Pennsylvanians will recall his father, Bob Casey, former governor of our humble commonwealth, and that's exactly what they're counting on. You see, Casey (Jr) is in favor of overturning Roe v. Wade. He supports the war in Iraq (albeit he is in favor of changing strategy, whatever that means). He is against legalizing same-sex marriage and even allowing same-sex couples to adopt children. Basically, in a week's time, we'll have to decide between one guy we know is a jerk and another guy who says he is, but hasn't proven it yet.

Democrats in Pennsylvania, particularly social progressives, have been sold out big time. The whole point of ousting Santorum would be to get rid of his ilk. Contrary to what these men may believe, there are some of us who feel that the government does not have the right to interfere with our personal lives.

Since I never trusted them to begin with, I don't feel like I've been kidnapped, raped and beaten and left in an alley with my kidney missing (politically), but that's how people should feel. I'm talking specifically about all the people two years ago waving "Kerry Edwards" signs with a rainbow pattern on them. The folks who thought that the democrats were the party that really wants social equality. Come on, man. As long as you're outnumbered by old people and hicks, they're not going to lift a finger to help.

Don't get me wrong. I'd rather the democrats win. As long as there is opposition in Washington (base, petty, partisan opposition being better than none at all) then we can avoid going too far down either road. Government works best when it's not working at all.

Marx was always hesitant to lay out a plan for the future. He disdained utopian thinking. He saw human civilization as always changing, evolving, learning from the mistakes of past systems and trying to do a better job next time. This kind of social dynamism is precisely what we could use right now. Like Marx, I don't know exactly what the future will look like, but I do know we could certainly use a clean slate right about now. When the two philosophical arms of the government are running the exact same candidate, something is very wrong.

There's nothing I'd like more than to see Rick Santorum filling out lobbying job applications after this election, but I'm afraid Casey's just not good enough for me. I proudly "threw my vote away" to Ralph Nader in 2004. I did this because he was the candidate I actually wanted to see in the white house. I won't vote for the lesser of two evils, especially in a case like this where the lesser is only slightly less evil.

I don't have a solution for this problem. Well, I do, but I don't want the government to make me disappear and water board me for the next ten years without charging me with anything (which they can do now!), so we'll leave those thoughts in my head where they belong.